Recently I spent an evening enjoying the company of Craig Ferguson, on his “Hot & Grumpy Tour – Walking The Earth”.
For anyone who hasn’t explored the humor of this once stand-up comedian and now late night TV host, then do so with caution, IF you are offended by the “F” word, which I wasn’t.
One phrase he used was “I’m not being judgmental… I am just telling the truth” when sharing his very funny antidotes of his own life’s journey in the world of humor. One example was he mentioned that Vancouver, British Columbia had a lot of Asians living there, he was in no way being prejudice or racist, because it is a fact. Vancouver is made up from a lot of ethnic groups, Asians possibly being the largest group.
After a while as he used this phrase over and over again when sharing his humor, and the phrase sort of grew on me.
Like an epiphany I realized that none of us are actually being judgmental when we share something with another human being. Our truth comes from many aspects of what we have either been taught by our parents, peers and so on, or what we have experienced ourselves up to that point in our ever evolving lives.
Therefore if we “own” that truth, it is ours. So principally we are not evaluating it from any other essence than the core of knowledge we have already learned. For some the awareness and experience may be very limited, so in my defense I will state “I’m not being judgmental…..”
Being judgmental is defined in the dictionary as “having or displaying an excessively critical point of view”.
But can we accept that on its own, or is there a more expansive way to accept others truths?
When we share something that we know as our “own” truth with another, we are not necessarily being negative or disapproving. In some cases we are actually communicating something that has either excited us or given us the opportunity to change our viewpoint.
I am not saying it is okay to impose upon another our own truths, but maybe if we all used the phrase “I am not being judgmental, I am just telling the truth”, others wouldn’t get so offended.
I know for sure that there have been many occasions in my life when I have shared something with someone who has got upset with me, indicating I was being judgmental, which I wasn’t.
So I am positive I am not alone in this experience.
Curious to know what you feel about this concept?
Written by Debbie A. Anderson